Gravity Falls: Going Out The In Door
by Shawn Gray
Summary: A deliberate foul sets forth a series of unfortunate events.
1. Chapter 1: Malo Function

**Very short, very spur of the moment. Feedback is welcome. I don't own Gravity Falls or any character represented in this fanfiction.**

"Dipper!" Mabel yelled. "Dipper! I need your help!" Dipper, hearing the supposed urgency in her voice, rushed down to the lower floor of the mall and ran toward the cry. "I'm coming!" he managed to say through his exhaustion. He found himself in front of a sweater store aptly named Sweaters 'R You. "I'm...coming?" Dipper said warily. He now had a doubt to whether or not his sister was in any real trouble. He still goes in anyway. Lo and behold, it was Jeff and his crew of gnome lackeys. Apparently, they thought they could ambush Mabel in a sweater store. Jeff knew this is where she'd be. Currently, he and his lackeys are in the process of smothering her to the point of unconsciousness. Dipper knew this was the case; Jeff liked Mabel too much to kill her. Still, his role as "Beta Twin"- "Ugh," he groaned to himself. He did not that Mabel thought of herself as the "Alpha Twin" but he absolutely hated referring to himself as "Beta Twin". Anyway, his role as the younger twin (by a few minutes mind you) basically compelled him to save his sister.

Being a prepubescent boy (or a tween), he wasn't all that strong. A rush wouldn't work. So, to augment his strength, he got the nearest battering weapon he could (a heavy duty broom). He tried so desperately not to hit Mabel, but it wasn't his luck. "_Oh well,_" he thought. "_At least she won't black out._" He managed to find Jeff in the swarm of gnome collected around Mabel and swung the broom at him akin to the way baseball player swings a bat. Jeff files back into a nearby sweater carousel. "Ow!" he whined. "That hurt. That actually hurt!" Dipper ignored him as he went to Mabel who was now free. That is because the other gnomes had went to help Jeff. "D...Dipper?" Mabel managed to squeak out. She looked at the sweater they smothered her with and went wide-eyed. "AH! FUSHIA!" She flung the garment elsewhere. Jeff left uttering the same thing he always does: how he will get Mabel one day. Her and Dipper were about to share in a touching sibling moment when they were promptly ejected from the store. "Your sweaters were crappy anyway!" Mabel yelled. Dipper tried to conceal a grin. He failed. They smiled at each other before going their separate ways. Dipper forgot why they came to the mall.

Dipper found himself going into a small restaurant. His body must had consciously led himself here because his stomach growled in that instant. "Hm. I guess a guy gets hungry when fighting gnomes," he thought aloud to himself. After a few minutes and an ice cream. He got up and was about to leave. He saw that he was closer to the IN door than the OUT. Without thinking much of it, he went out the IN door. Unfortunately, this action of his proved to be a bad move. He bumped right into Pacifica Northwest! That's the least of his problems. He also toppled both of them to the ground with him over top of her. And the worst is that he made her spill something she was holding all over her clothes! "Ah, what the-" the rich girl sputtered out before coming to the same realization Dipper had a few seconds ago. She did the only thing she could: scream. "AHHHH! DIPPER PINES, LOOK WHAT YOU DID!" He quickly got up in the way someone would if they had done something they shouldn't had. In a way, he did. He wasn't listening to anything she was saying until... "How are you gonna pay for this?" She stared at him. If you're familiar with the Northwest family, you'd know they weren't particularly cheap. So anything they had could easily be out of Dipper's price range. Bringing Grunkle Stan into this was obviously a bad idea. It was also apparent that Dipper was silent for way too long.

"Well?" she asked.

"Uh, uhhh, uhhhh..." he managed to stammer out.  
An idea sneaked into her head. "I know," she said.

He did not like the smile she had. "Kn-Know what?" he asked, dreading the answer.

She grinned as cutely as possible for her. "You're going to take me on a date!" she beamed.

"Oh no," he muttered as she dragged him along with her.

"Right now is lovely," she said as they head to the more expensive part of the mall.

**And now, you decide. I've gotten some of your submissions and am working on integrating them in the story. Please stay tuned to more coming soon! Submissions are closed.**


	2. Submission 1: Bittersweet Escape

**For SophiaCrutchfeild**

**Bittersweet Escape**

Dipper quickly tried to look for a way out. He could not go on a date with HER. What if Wendy saw them? His chances with her would be ruined! ...Well, even more ruined than they are right now. He curses himself for ever thinking a twelve year old tween like him could ever be with an awesome fifteen year old teenager like Wendy Corduroy. But enough self pity. Even if he weren't worried about his chances with Wendy (which tries and fails to assure himself he doesn't), he couldn't date Pacifica of all people. Even if she is kind of cute... No! He just couldn't! He had to think up a way to get out of there fast!

Pacific, who is still grabbing on to Dipper's hand, eventually gets outwardly annoyed at Dipper's lack of sound. Inwardly, she wonders if he may be up to something. Dipper was always the smarter one of the Pine twins. Could it be that he didn't trust her? Possibly. She never gave him a reason to trust her. In fact, he's only ever seen her be mean, especially towards his twin sister. She shook her head to rid herself of these thoughts. That's when she noticed that they have barely moved that far. She looked back to see Dipper standing firmly in place. At least, as firmly as he can.

_Get a grip, Dipper, _he thought. _You are a man. A manly man! You do what you want!_ Dipper stood firmly in place, even if he was being pulled inch by inch. Pacifica hadn't seemed to notice that they weren't moving. _Okay, think! What would Tyrone do in this situation?_ he thought. He didn't have much time to think because Pacifica was now looking him square in the face.

Pacifica put on her usual façade. "Is there anything wrong? Do you need to do something lame first?" Dipper was struggling to find a good answer to her question. "Uh...uh..." he stammered. _Come on, ya big nerd. Get a hold of yourself!_ Unable to come up with a decent reply, he was left to fall back on his standby plan. He mocked being creeped out. "Ugh," Pacifica snorted. "What are you doing?" Dipper started to act more agitated until... "NON-SPECIFIC EXCUSE!" he yelled at the top of his lungs. At once, all attention fell to them. Pacifica, embarrassed by the random act, slaps in the arm. "Don't you dare do that again," Pacifica said red-faced. Dipper then noticed that the hand she was dragging him with was the one she held him with. Without a second thought, he turned to leave. And crashes right into a tile salesman.

Pacifica was so busy dealing with onlookers that she complete disregarded the hold she had on Dipper's hand. When she finally did notice, he was being talked to by a fast-talking tile salesman. Dipper looked obviously confused. She guessed he had never been to an auction before. Upon closer inspection, she saw that the guy looked familiar. "Menendez?" she inquired. The guy froze. "Raul Menendez. So this is what you're doing nowadays, huh?" Raul took a step back. "Ms. Northwest! How are your parents? Hope everything's going great. Have a nice day!" Raul then hightailed out of the immediate area. Dipper turned to faced Pacifica. He looked sort of apologetic. Pacifica would have none of that. "That was Raul Menendez," she explained. "He used to be our fountain slash pond slash pool cleaner until father thought that mother was cheating with him. I hadn't known he-" "Thank you very much," Dipper interjected. Pacifica replaced her façade. "I'm sure it wasn't-" Dipper once again cuts her off. He had pulled her into a kiss! Afterwards, Dipper pulls away. "Oh crap," he said. "I shouldn't have done that." He turns and runs leaving a very confused Pacifica, still touching her lips.


	3. Submission 2: Rotten Candy Part I

**For ****StkAmbln**

**Rotten Candy**

"Don't worry about a thing, Dipper," Pacifica said after a couple of minutes of silence. "I come here to eat all the time. The staff is great." Pacifica had taken them to a moderately good non-fast food restaurant for their 'date'. As much as Dipper didn't want to be there with her, he couldn't say he didn't enjoy his time with her so far. He helped her shop for new clothes (by being a clothes rack) and even though he had no input, he did get to see her in some pretty clothes. She picked out clothes for him to. She simply shrugged him off when he asked saying, "You're not going to be seen with me looking like THAT." He may not know much about dating and girls but he knew that she probably had some sort of alternate meaning in there. The same could go for when they went to the shoe outlet when she 'asked' him to 'help her' with her shoes. He might be overthinking things but he could have sworn that she liked it when he touched her feet. Luckily he is smart enough not to question her about it. She has some pretty...violent outbursts of anger. Actually, he didn't know who to be more afraid of in this situation; Pacifica who could very well break his arms and shatter his teeth, or Grunkle Stan who would probably not be so forgiving about placing them further in debt. So, he figured, he would do ask Pacifica asked so he wouldn't become another mystery of Gravity Falls. He pries at his sirloin steak. They have already tried casual conversation. But, with nothing in common, they didn't get very far. So they just ate, exchanging glances every once in a while.

Meanwhile back when the twins split, Mabel went to the Pick-A-Pal stuffed animal and accessory store to find stuff to make stickers with. She was humming a Sev'ral Timez song that got stuck in her head again. "Hm," she thought aloud. "I wonder how those boys are doing out there."

* * *

Meanwhile with Sev'ral Timez...

* * *

Deep Chris backed against the cave wall as he watch his last friend get eaten by what could be described as a reverse gryphon. The reverse gryphon homed in on him. "No, no, no, man!" he screamed.

* * *

Back at the Mall...

* * *

Mabel simply shrugged. "They'll be fine. They are Sev'ral Timez after all." After picking up what she needed (even though it was mostly glitter), she went to the checkout. "Mabel?" a sort husky prepubescent voice called out. She quickly pivoted around. Mabel would know that voice anywhere. "Oh my god, girls!" she exclaimed as she rushed over to her two best friends Grenda and Candy. "Hi Mabel," said Candy in her usual semi-light Korean accent. Grenda hugged both girls to the point that they weren't even on the ground anymore. You see, Grenda wasn't like most girls. It's generally dainty, cute, and caring. She was none of these. She was more akin to a guy, to be blunt. An effeminate guy. "Mabel, what are you doing here?" asked Grenda after she let the poor girls down. "Oh, you know," Mabel replied. "Just getting stuff to make more stickers." The twin watched her friends exchange glances. "You mean you haven't heard?" Candy asked the girl. "Heard what?" said Mabel in her goofball way. "Omigosh! The new boy band Men R Boys are coming to this mall RIGHT NOW!" Grenda yelled. Mabel, realizing this as another chance for romance, quickly paid for the stuff and went to the appointed spot.

After the fallout, the girls had decided to wander around the mall more. Neither of them had come close to actually speaking to the boys. This is about where the twins timelines match back up with Dipper still on his 'date'. The girls had almost passed by the restaurant in its entirety until Candy, taking in the atmosphere, notices the 'couple' and beckons her friends over. Now, many of you may not know but our fair Candy had started growing attracted to her friend's twin a while back. Something clicked and said, "He's sorta cute." So she contributed the sick feeling she felt at the pit of her stomach to envy. "Hey, isn't that Dipper and...PACIFICA!?" Grenda thought aloud. Mabel's face was unreadable. Grenda didn't like it. Candy absolutely LOATHED it...not that she would tell anyone that. "She is obviously trying to find a way to demean us more," Candy said. Grenda nodded. This was something that they knew could be true. Mabel continued to examine the scene. They look so...shy. She knew Dipper wasn't good at speaking 'normal' but he was completely silent. "Alright," she said to no one. "The Alpha Twin is going to save the day!" The others nodded. "So what's the plan?" Grenda asked. "We can use frogs," Candy replied. _Okay,_ Mabel thought. _Frogs might- Wait. What?_ "Whoa girls," Mabel says. "How are frogs going to help Dipper with his date?" Candy and Grenda looked at Mabel. Grenda spoke. "It'll help separate them." Mabel's almost ever-present smile left her face in lieu of a sad frown. "We can't sabotage his date! It's wrong and I will have no part!" "Fine," Candy said.

"Fine," said Mabel.

Mabel left them there.

After the guy and gal had finished their awkward meal, they decided to walk around the mall to pass the time since Pacifica wasn't due back until around six and it was only now becoming three. Candy and Grenda sprung a water puddle trap. Mabel counteracted with giving Dipper a cloth which he didn't question but put it over the puddle. Pacifica, not seeing the girls, is grateful of the gesture and walks across the cloth. Dipper looks back to see Mabel giving him a thumbs up. Maybe she didn't care that he was on a date with someone who gives them grief. "I'm sorry that I hadn't said anything," he began saying to Pacifica. "It's just that...well...um..."

"It's just that this was your first date," Pacifica finished.

"Right! And that most of the time, I'm just...you know..."

"You're doing the supernatural thing."

"Yeah. I..."

"It's alright, Dipper. This was actually my first date, too." She blushed and closed her eyes. Candy and Grenda launched a flying bouquet at Pacifica. Mabel caught it with a net and gave the flowers to Dipper who, in turn, gave them to Pacifica who chose not to wonder where he got them from. Various shenanigans like this went on and on. Eventually, the bad side (Mabel calls them) decided that they needed outside help if they wanted to end this. And they really wanted to end this.

"Yo, who's this and how did you get my number?"

"That's not important right now. I want you to help me with something."

"Why should I help you? I don't even know you. I'm hanging up-"

"I guess you don't want revenge on Dipper Pines."

"Wait. Did you just say Dipper?"

"So you do, huh?"

"What do I have to do?"

"I'll explain in person at the mall, Robbie."

**COMMERCIAL BREAK**

* * *

**Woo. This is a looooong one. My decision to split this came from the fact that I really don't like to keep people waiting and I wanted a cliffhanger. My time is becoming scarce so please bear with me a bit more, okay? Feel free to drop a review. I'm eager to know what you think so far!**


	4. Submission 2: Rotten Candy Part II

**For ****StkAmbln**

**Rotten Candy Part II**

"So?" Grenda asked Candy. "How did it go?" Candy hung up the payphone. "It went quite well. With his help, we will be able to break them up for good." Grenda looked lost in thought for a second. "So how is this supposed to work again?" she asked. Candy's face skewed into one of irritancy for a brief second before becoming "normal" again. With Grenda you have to trade off brains for brawn and although brawn is valuable, it aggravates her that Grenda couldn't even grasp the simplest of instructions. She explains to her one more time. "Since Robbie and Dipper are bitter rivals, it would only make sense that they would be at ends with each other. Once Robbie defeats Dipper, Pacifica will see how weak he is and leave him." _I'm sorry I have to do this,_ she thought. "What about Robbie?" Grenda asked. "We'll get him on assault charges after he has dealt with Dipper," Candy explained. Grenda just nodded. Candy knows she's just doing that to appease her and not that she really does understand but she lets it slide, mainly because Grenda doesn't need to do anything. She sighs. This fighting, this arguing, is straining them both. But she's got to stand firm if she wants to get her man, er, Dipper from out of Pacifica's rich, snobby hands. They take their places.

Mabel took a seat in a nearby chair, exhausted. Candy and Grenda seemed to have relented for now but there was no telling when they would strike next. But, wow, she was beat. Looking over to Dipper and Pacifica who were dancing together (and pretty badly by her standards and too close to the fountain), she managed to smile because for once she saw him completely drop his anxiety and OCD-like tendencies and really, REALLY enjoy himself. Just hearing him laugh at something not book-related and say things that aren't about conspiracies is something almost alien to her. It's almost as if he reverted back to "pre-Gravity Falls, Oregon" Dipper. She gets maybe about a half second look away before her eyes spot a familiar sight; a goth-like teen wearing a hoodie with a stitched-up heart across the zipper. Unzipped, it looked almost as if it were broken. The figure looked to be heading off to the food court…

Robbie Valentino shuffled along towards the mall not really in any hurry. He was more lost in thought than anything. Scheming. Planning. He wanted to get back at Dipper as much as he wanted to get back with Wendy. But Wendy liking the little nuisance means not being able to "put him in his place" without severely upsetting Wendy. That totally blows. Maybe this so-called "helper" can actually help with this problem. When he becomes fully aware of his surroundings, he realizes that not only did he already arrive at the mall but he was also on his way to a hot dog stand. He tried to leave but his stomach protested against that. _Right,_ he thought. _Food first._

OOF! WHOA! KERPLUNK! Pacifica looked on with wide eyes as Dipper somehow managed to fall into the fountain. It's a shallow fountain so he doesn't drown but the landing still hurts, mainly from all the coins in there. Dipper resists the urge to pocket them. After a minute or two of silence, Pacifica bursts into a laughing fit. Dipper does, too. "Wow. I guess I really do have two left feet," he said, getting out of the pond and sitting on its edge. Pacifica sits next to him. "Yeah. I thought you were kidding about that. You know, my parents got me a personal dance teacher. I could see if she would be willing to teach you." Dipper rubbed the back of his head. "Y-You don't have to do that for me. Besides, you might get in trouble-" Dipper appeared in sudden realization of something. "What time is it!?" Pacifica seemed to realize this too as it dawned on her. "Shoot! My parents are gonna kill me!" It's been way more than three hours. In fact, it was now 25 to eight! Where did the time go? Pacifica got up and shot him an apologetic glance before…

The two girls, Grenda and Candy, meet up with Robbie a little after he was done with his…hot dog? Was that even a hot dog anymore? There was so much stuff piled onto it! _Teens sure do have weird appetites,_ Candy thought. _Even weirder than mothers!_ "We've been waiting for you, Robbie," she said. The look on Robbie's face was priceless. He was called out here by that loser's sister's friends? Wow, either there's a joke in there somewhere or this is just very ironic. "This isn't a set-up, is it? Because I swear if it is-" Candy shushed him. "Not so loud. They might hear you." She told him the plan. "So you want me to just beat him up?" The girls nodded. He thought it over for a minute. "Don't worry," Grenda said. "If Wendy comes by, just say you caught him stealing one of her bras." He looked at them for a brief moment. Candy stepped up close to him. "The evidence is already placed. He's over by the fountain." Robbie felt like face palming. Of course a loser like him would just walk pass him. Hopefully he wasn't spotted… But he has. Mabel, sneaking away from her brother's butchering of a slow dance, followed Robbie from the obscurity of various stands and racks. Although she could not hear the conversation, she knew something wasn't right when the girls went up to him. As Robbie walked back the way he came, she pursued.

It all happened so fast. A whirlwind of activity and sound. And Dipper was right in the middle of it. Pacifica leaned in and kissed him on the cheek for all but a microsecond before an unpleasant voice made itself known. "Pacifica Northwest! You come from wherever you are this instant! You know we have a very important party to get to!" it bellowed. At least, that's how it sounded as the dread of their separation has now boiled over. Someone had to make a choice. Pacifica chose to stay put. Or rather, she wasn't able to move. "W-What are you doing!?" Dipper anxiously asked her. "If your parents see you her with me, we'll- OOF!" He felt what he assumed was a plank of wood slam into him. But as his senses came back to him, he realized that that wasn't it and he was stupid to think that up. Pacifica yelled. Unfortunately, that alerted her parents to her current location. Robbie, the one who tackled Dipper into the fountain, slowly got up with the preteen still pinned down. "What do you want, Robbie, 'cause I haven't done anything!" Dipper struggled. "Did you really think I'd let you off that easily!? It was because of YOU that I lost Wendy!" Robbie countered. "Me!? You didn't lose her because of me. You lost her because you a horrible- GACK!" Dipper couldn't even double over in pain as Robbie delivered a series of several blows to the stomach. Pacifica had to join in. She had to help!

She...couldn't move. Something, or rather someone, had grabbed her. "You know better than to have us come to get you personally!" said none other than Preston Northwest, richest man of the town and Pacifica's father. Not that it matters much in this instance. "Hunny," her mother Priscilla Northwest said to her father. "Perhaps we should leave the scolding for later? Being among their 'kind' is making me anxious." It didn't matter at this point since they were quite literally dragging her along. She protested. "No wait- stop! I need to help Dipper!" Her dad scoffed. "You? Help that low-level trash? It seems someone has been benefiting from her humor lessons." Ugh. She didn't have to see him to know that he wore THAT smile. That super-pleased-with-himself smile. There's nothing she can do.

Dipper was nearly drowned in that shallow fountain, mostly because every time he did a chance to recapture precious air it was either punched out of him or he breathed in the water. Mabel had tried once, twice, three times to stop Robbie and every time he would knock her back. And while the fight (or beating if you would prefer) went on, Grenda and Candy watched. Their goal was accomplished at least from their point of view. So why haven't they called the cops yet. It was mostly because they were too shocked to. They didn't want either of the twins to get hurt, Mabel mostly. Candy saw Dipper as a cost. They see Mabel as…their best friend. Grenda was the first to speak. "I…I can't take this anymore… It isn't right!" Candy couldn't move so Grenda gave her a lift to the payphone. "You have to-" And in an instant, Candy had called the cops. Ironically enough, Sheriff Blubs and Deputy Durland were, in fact, in the candle store next to the fountain. Being competent for once, they arrested Robbie but not before Dipper blacked out.

…

"**AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!**" Dipper screamed! Mabel stepped back, looking guilty. They were in a clinic now. Candy and Grenda stood next to the door, also looking guilty. What was everyone so guilty about? It's not like anything happened, right? When he attempted to move, his body protested. "…Can somebody tell me what's going on?" he complained. They explained to him the events of the previous day. Dipper seemed understanding…enough. "I don't think I can ever trust you guys again…but I'll try." Just then, Pacifica walked in with red cosmos. "I'm really sorry I could help you yesterday." Dipper shook his head. "It wasn't your fault. Your parents are butts." She smirked. "Yeah they are. I brought you some flowers." She left them on his lap and ran away. "I have to go!" was the last thing he heard her say. "That was nice of her-er-er-ACHOO!" He puffed up. He's allergic to red cosmos! Well, Pacifica didn't know so she's not to blame. Unfortunately…

"Come back here!"  
"Look what you've done to Dipper!"  
"I don't want to be sick!"


	5. Chapter 2: I Hate Cliches

**Okay, time for the conclusion of this blurb. THE TRUE CHAPTER 2!**

Dipper bursts up out of a bed screaming. He has to rub his eyes to regain his bearings. One thing's for sure; this wasn't his room. Or rather, it wasn't his current room. His room was never in monochrome. It took him a second before it clicked in his head and he groaned when it did. "Alright, Bill, come out. I know you're here." Suddenly a triangular being popped into existence. "Well, well, well~, if it isn't Pine Tree," said Bill. "Did you enjoy your little journey?" Dipper said nothing for a while. In fact, it almost seemed like he wasn't planning on saying anything at all. Then he actually did say something. "So… that… was all just a dream?" His words asked a question but they conveyed a saddened statement. He never went on that date or even left the house, right? Bill seemed to scoff at him. He may be a dream demon but that doesn't mean he has complete control over dreams. He tells him this. "What? So you're saying that I willingly dreamed of Pacifica? Why would I do that? She's, like, my sister's enemy!" Bill laughed. "I don't know, Pine Tree. You tell me!"

He woke up.

He was in his room now. He checked the digital clock on the desk. It read 4:13 AM. His sheets were soaked. Touching his forehead, he realized that he had been sweating quite profusely and was short on breath. He took a minute to settle himself down. It would be very bad if he had a heart attack now and at his age. He fell back on the squeaky mattress. He mumbled incoherently into the silence. _I can't really like Pacifica… can I? _he thought. The more he tried to avoid it, the more it made him think of her.

**THE END**

**Then the Mystery of Northwest Manor happened. Maybe.**

**Thanks for everyone reading! This really has been a journey for everyone including me. I hope you have had as much fun reading as I had writing. Don't forget to drop a review (if you want to).**


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